I am really surprised. This cycle, too, was a bust. Completely blank BFNs for four straight days. I was shocked. I was sure that we had done our job perfectly this time and that everything was going smoothly. I don’t know what happened. I was doing so good this cycle too. I wasn’t antsy at all really until Wednesday. Even though I had two BFNs before then, I really wasn’t upset. It was a hard day for me Wednesday. It was a really downer day; the day that it started to sink in that it wasn’t going to happen this time. I’ve prayed about it a lot and I’m much better now. I had a little tantrum between God and I and He has been speaking to me the past couple days, letting me know that soon, just not today, it will be our turn.

I prayed a lot about TTC before we started. I asked that if now wasn’t in His timing, that I just not get pregnant. I didn’t want to go through the miscarriages again. It hurts too much. And so, I think He is doing just that. He is telling me to wait. So I’m waiting. Waiting for AF, that is. She should be coming tomorrow – I hope – and with that, the start of cycle 3. We will keep trying and waiting until God decides its time, and I’ll keep praying for peace and patience.

Until next time