Dear Angel Baby

Today would have been our baby’s due date. It makes me wonder if I would have had her already or if she would still be tucked away in my womb as I anxiously awaited the day that we welcomed our little princess into this world. I honestly thought that the miscarriages were a fluke. I was pregnant for ten weeks before I lost her. When I got the results back from the chromosome testing, I was heartbroken to hear that it was a girl. I had prayed for a girl. Not that I would’ve loved a boy any less. But I was going to have my little princess. A girl to dress in bows and one day relive my teenage years vicariously through her. A daughter to raise into a Godly young lady. A daughter that Javier would one day walk down the aisle.  A little sister to Sylas for him to play with and love and pull her hair and fight with. A mother to my future grand babies. A niece to my brothers and the first granddaughter to my parents. She was so loved even though no one knew her. I think of what life would be like had she stayed. I think of all of the heartache that followed. I wish anything I could have done something to keep her. But now I have an angel baby who can watch over her family from heaven and know that she is loved.

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