Back from vacation

Sorry I didn’t post last week! Not to worry though, I am back now and have a bit of information to share. As you know, I O’d two days early this past cycle and was pretty hopeful about our chances. I tested at 11 DPO and got a negative. I used both the amazon cheapies and a first response. I was pretty disappointed because usually I can get a faint BFP by then. I decided to wait a couple days and try again. So I did. I had to look at it really hard. Like cross-eyed, upside-down, with a flashlight hard. But I saw a line. I didn’t get my hopes up too high because it was so faint. I decided to wait until a couple days after AF was a no-show before testing again. Low and behold, AF showed up the next day. A day early, no less. I had AWFUL cramps and super heavy bleeding. Like having to change every 2-3 hours heavy. It felt exactly like my first MC. So I’ve come to the conclusion that I am having another CP. I’m upset. Had I not tested the day before, I would have never known. I am so frustrated and just want answers! I’m so tired of this. Its getting old and I feel like nobody has done anything productive as far as testing and treatment for me. Its all been a lot of wait and see and try again. My regular OB is so busy that it takes 4-6 weeks to get in to see her if you aren’t preggo. She is a very nice person, but I don’t think she is equipped to help me in my situation. I am at my wits end. I have read so many articles and blogs to drive me crazy. I have information overload. There are just so many possibilities of what could be happening. I need to get away from it for a while but I honestly feel like I don’t have time to. The waiting huts so badly and I feel like I have waited so long already (definitely not as long as some have to but still). I am going to leave this post at that for today.  TTYL

2 thoughts on “Back from vacation

  1. Hi! Ive been reading your blog and totally understand what you are going through! I just had my fourth MC (the 3rd this year). I can relate to how you feel and the frustration of not having answers. Fortunately and after tons of testing and four very painful (physically and emotionally) losses, we just discovered I have a chromosomal abnormality (balanced translocation) that causes my miscarriages. Even though we got an answer, I feel like most of the things I know about my condition, my body and what happened during my miscarriages is because of my own research. Doctors seem to be super busy and I have to wait weeks to see them. My RE wants me to get two more tests done before seeing me to discuss my results (even though we know what causes the miscarriages and those two tests aren’t necessary). Im tired of reading every single article out there and trying to makes sense of it all. Im mostly tired of not being able to get past week 6 or 7, not being able to see my bump grow and the nonstop grieving Ive been going through. You are not alone, our situations really suck and it gets old, tiring and frustrating really fast. The things that have helped me go through this have been my faith, my church family and counseling.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I am so glad someone is out there with me!! Not glad that you are going through this too, but glad that I have someone to confide in! Sometimes I feel like I write this blog to myself!
      I am really hoping that this next cycle works out for us. If it doesn’t, we may need a break to just get away from the stress. As you know all too well, this old game really does take a toll on your mind!
      Do you write as well? I would love to follow you if you do! Thanks so much for posting!!!


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